Children’s Books that will never be published

When I began this blog, it was titled as it is (‘lightly’) because part of my aim was to inject humor into it.

Well, it’s been a while, and I’ve done a lot of writing not at all involved with horses. Besides, it’s my blog and it doesn’t ALWAYS have to be horsey humor. That, and the epidemic has forced me into digging into boxes of papers…news clippings, jokes, emails from friends…that I’ve always been meaning to ‘get around to’ filing it in some other form than a shoe box.

So here is one and hopefully more funny stuff will follow. Stars know we need it in times like these.

Children’s Books that Never Made It

1. You Are Different and That’s Bad

2. The Boy Who Died From Eating All His Vegetables

3. Fun Four-Letter Words to Know and Share

4. Hammers, Screwdrivers and Knives: An I-Can-Do-It Book

5. The Kid’s Guide to Hitchhiking

6. Kathy Was So Bad Her Mom Stopped Loving Her

7. Curious George and the High-Voltage Fence

8. All Cats Go To Hell

9. The Little Sissy Who Snitched

10. Some Kittens Can Fly

11. That’s It, I’m Putting You Up For Adoption

12. Grandpa Gets A Casket

13. The Magic World Inside the Abandoned Freezer

14. Garfield Gets Rabies

15. The Pop-Up Books of Human Anatomy

16. Strangers Have the Best Candy

17. Whining, Kicking and Crying to Get Your Way

18. You Were an Accident

19. Things Rich Kids Have but You Never Will

20. Pop! Goes the Hamster-and Other Great Microwave Games

21. The Man in the Moon Is Actually Satan

22. Fun Games to Play Behind the Altar

23. Your Nightmares are Real

24. Where Would You Like to Be Buried?

25. Mr. Fork and Mr. Electrical Outlet Are Friends

26. Places Where Mommy and Daddy Hide Neat Things

27. Daddy Drinks Because You Cry

About subodai213

Retired U.N.C.L.E agent. Living in Laurasia.
This entry was posted in Uncategorized. Bookmark the permalink.

2 Responses to Children’s Books that will never be published

  1. subodai213 says:

    Believe it or not…mind you, I wasn’t the author of this, I did clean it up a little. There were a few that were just a little beyond the pale!
    I guess it’s ‘woke’ now, although that usage just irks me. Americans just don’t know how to speak English!!

  2. Stella C says:

    Well I laughed heartily, but watch out for brickbats from politically correct (or is it “woke” now?!) parents!! C

Comments are closed.